So then why am I writing a blog? Maybe it's because I just want to add some light and goodness to social media. I see posts all the time bashing people who show their perfect lives on social media and then I turn around and see posts bashing people who complain about their imperfect lives. That doesn't make sense. People should just live their lives.
So I guess what I'm saying is I have a hard time writing here. I want to post happy things, and sad things and just be real and show the world (or whoever reads this) that it's okay to be human and have ups and downs and it's okay to share them. But it's scary. It's scary because I know people bash or I know people think things like "wow that's not real" or "I'm glad she's having a bad day" or "I'm amazed she shares so much with social media" or "she shouldn't be talking about this on social media". It's like...maybe I'm reading too many blogs about social media and how it should be and the unspoken "rules" of what we post. So I'm digging this little hole of trying to please people with what I post.
Case in point: I wanted to update some pictures of my daughters recent birthday. I added pictures of other parties in the past I had not shared with "social media" as well. All of the comments and likes made me really happy. People said some very nice things and it felt good to get attention for hard work. And then I thought, "oh my gosh these actually aren't all my original ideas and should I say something like, I got this idea off Pinterest"? And then I thought, "people are probably like...well I don't like doing parties and parties are dumb because it's all about mom's one upping each other and I read an article the other day about how this mom wasn't going to do parties and fun things for her kids." Well ya me too. I read that article too. And I liked it. I liked the idea of not having pressure to do fun activities.
I also read stuff about hyper-parenting and creating too many fun activities for our kids and then we're exhausted and they're always expecting more more more!! So then I'm like...wait. I actually really enjoy doing parties. I enjoy the process of searching things on Pinterest and spending weeks writing menus and planning things. I honestly like it. Do I get stressed sometimes? Sure I do. Do I often think, "why am I doing this? What am I teaching my child? Have I bought into the competitive parenting world"??? and I read books about parenting and then they start to contradict each other and I WANT TO SCREAM.
What is this world? The internet gives us all this information. Information that can be shared by anyone to anyone. I'm just posting words on this screen and now you're reading them and you believe me? But really, such a weird thing. To have all this information about parenting, and people's opinions about parenting and then someone's opinion about having opinions about parenting and it's all this pressure! Pressure to live in a way that lives up to what?
Yes, I read this parenting book called "Simplicity Parenting" I liked all of it except one thing and that's not important. Actually I take it back, it is the whole point of this blog entry. It talked about not talking to your child about their emotions. My personal opinion (knock it if you will ;)) is that emotions should 100% be talked about about modeled for your child. So I was really struggling reading this. It wasn't feeling right to me. I felt confused and anxious and just annoyed about it. So after my panic attack I prayed. What in the world do I do?? I like this book and this philosophy but not this thing and how do I make it feel right? I immediately felt peace that I didn't have to do anything I read anywhere. I can make my own culture. I don't have to do what one man says. And I gained great insight that I can receive answers to my prayers from My Heavenly Father about how to best parent my child. It could be that I read a book about parenting or about something and then I pray to know what was true and what I can do to better myself through some of the philosophies. The Spirit will always testify of truth.
In my Human Development class someone asked my teacher what the best parenting book was. His answer? The scriptures. I will not tell you everything I have learned about parenting from reading the words of God. But I will tell you this. He knew we would be down here struggling for guidance as we parent these precious spirit children of His. He knew we wouldn't know what to do. He knew there would be too much information spewing from the internet. Too many clashing philosophies from parenting experts. He knew it. This is why we have the guidance of the scriptures, the guidance from our Prophets and the gift of the Holy Ghost to literally help us discern truth. I gained incredible insight that night as I realized that I don't need to look further then trying to understand how our Father in Heaven parents us. He is the perfect balance of Mercy and Justice. Kindness and Firmness. Boundaries that demand obedience, and natural consequences that follow disobedience. How incredible to have this knowledge.
This internet is great. It's a wonderful tool. We can share parts of our lives and souls. It's scary. I'm scared to even publish this but I can't help but want to share a bit of my thoughts so maybe you'll think...oh, she thinks that too? Yep. I think all those things too.